Open Adoption In California
Among the many advantages of open adoption in California is the link between the biological family and adopted child. This helps in providing a child with the knowledge about their true identity and roots.
At some point of time in life, nearly all the children, whether or not that they are adopted, go through a phase that is commonly known as identity crisis. In the course of this period of questioning, searching and at times even depression and rebellion, a child is extremely curious of where they have come from, who they actually are as well as the direction that they are taking in life. In case of adopted children, the process has as high likelihood of presenting some very significant and unique problems to both the adopted kids and the parents.
Adopted Child knowing the roots
When an adopted kid looks at themselves in a mirror, they see clearly their appearance and physical features are not the same as those of
their adoptive parents. Most children tend to be perceptive. Such an adopted child would also realize that they have personality traits and talents that are way different from that what their adoptive parents possess. Such types of feelings help in awakening the desire to explore as well as to understand real roots in adopted child. Such desires and feelings are not bad. In reality, they are in fact very normal and healthy. In cases of children who are not adopted, they can see on an everyday basis their behavioral and genetic roots are similar to their natural parents. This is a luxury an adopted child does not share.
The meaning of open adoption for the adoptive families
Open adoption means raising an adopted child honestly and sharing with them the fact that their biological family loves them a lot to choose the option for adoption in their interests. It means you have knowledge of the medical history of the child and its biological family. This asset is very valuable in open adoption. It means you can be a honored adopted parents. You can treasure your child or baby knowing that you are chosen to look after a bundle of joy for life.
In the winter of 2001, we began our journey. The process was stressful. We started on the Web site of Pact, an adoption alliance that specializes in placing children of color, learning exactly what was involved in having an open adoption, and filling out all the paperwork electronically. We had heard that the adoption process takes a long time, but for children of color, that’s not necessarily the case, especially when it’s open and the parents are a couple of color.
Next, we set up an in-person meeting with a Pact representative, traveling to San Francisco from our home in Arizona. The woman we met was a birth mother herself. She said that her son was doing well and that she was very much in his life; she sees him on family holidays, and when he was young, she sometimes babysat for him when his adoptive parents went out. I listened carefully, but knew then and there that this was not the kind of open adoption I wanted. I thought that her boy was probably very confused.
Differences aside, the counselor was thrilled that we were pursuing adoption and told us we would have no problem adopting a child quickly — upon completion of the adoption information, we could adopt in mere months. We were ecstatic but scared by the reality that we would soon be parents.
…..A mother’s story of open adoption
Open adoption offers comfort both to the adoptive families and the birth parents in a number of ways. For a child, the outcome of such adoption is that there are a lot of people who will love them – something which is what we all yearn for. So one can look at it that an adopted kid receives more care and love as compared to a child that is not adopted.
The meaning of open adoption for the birth families
Women facing unplanned pregnancy have a number of choices today with such as adoption. Creating this kind of adoption plan comprises choice of choosing adoptive parents for the child personally, meeting the adoptive family personally if you so wish, making a decision on kind of openness as well as the amount of contact in future that you want as birth parent or birth mother. This additional option of open adoption will help women with unplanned pregnancy in deciding how they wish to deal with their babies.
Open adoption offers many choices
Open adoption offers several choices for the women – the kind of adoptive family they want, social background you give importance to such as sports, music or education and faith the child is raised in. Due to choices in such adoption method, the birth parent would feel a lot more comforted on seeing their child being raised safely as they grow healthy and happy in adoptive home they have chosen for them.
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There are good things to open adoption. It is possible to gain another “family” member
Both women had good reasons for wanting an open adoption. The birth mother was an adoptee herself. And Erin had never met her father, who vanished soon after her mom became pregnant. Erin and the birth mom connected right away. She and John drove several hours to attend the birth mom’s ob-gyn visits, and they joined her in the delivery room. But as Erin left the hospital with Alison in her arms, she felt strangely conflicted. “I was thrilled about having a baby,” she says, “but I felt real sadness for the birth mom’s loss, because we’d made a real connection.”
Their friendship has blossomed during the last two years. Erin talks to the birth mom several times a week and shares every detail of Alison’s life as a toddler. Each has met the other’s extended family, and they exchange birthday and Christmas gifts. Still, the Anhalts stress that they aren’t coparenting. “To Allie, Erin is ‘Mommy.’ Her birth mom is more like a member of our extended family,” says John. Both sides are committed to making the dynamic work, for their child’s sake. “Alison is a very happy kid,” says Erin. “I’m grateful that she’ll always know her adoption story and how much she is loved by her birth mom.”
…..A story of 2 families that became great friends in an open adoption
Open Adoption In California
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